a quote

"Patience is passion tamed."

Here We Go Bluebird

I've always been told its good to wear your heart on your sleeve, because otherwise you'll never know when you find love. But its much easier to be heartbroken that way... I've found myself to be very heartbroken lately. Not because I have lost a boy, just the absence of one. There is no one "special". Its a hard sort of feeling. Odd all at the same time. I've been keeping my head up the best I can, and I've been trying not to think the worst of every boy I meet. Not an easy job, mind you.


Reminding myself that I'm only 18, and have plenty of time to find my soul mate is something I don't like to do. I want to be 20 and incandescently in love. I want to know that I won't be alone for the rest of my life; Because, to be completely honest, that is a huge fear of mine. But one day I will be 20, and some day I will be incandescently in love... Just not soon enough for my taste.


Go love someone today, anyone.
Just love.

Relief

"Never Run after a bus or a man. There will always be another one coming."

FYI

Today I have come to a realization that no matter how broken and torn my family may be, I love them so much. Just the other day my mom made me a bracelet, and I have yet to take it off because it keeps her with me all day long. My sisters keep me on my toes and always know what to say. My brother-in-law Christopher, although I fell like sometimes he does not like me, is always there for me like a REAL big brother. Always. And my dad... some days I claim to hate him, and I am still unable to forgive him, but he is like that guy that every time you see him you get butterflies and don't know what to say. I love my daddy.


My grandma, my cousins, aunts and uncles... I don't know what I'd do without them.
And Andrew, my cousin, is my other big brother. He keeps involved in my life even though he lives states away. I love him with all my heart.


Do not take family for granted. No matter what happens. They are the people you can lean on no matter the situation.

"The family is a haven in a heartless world"

Reassurance

Last night at 12:05 Dalton reminded me of our 1st grade love for each other. A little song called When I Go by Slow Club. He told me to listen to it because it reminded him of us.
I have this awful fear that I will grow old and alone. It is an awful awful thing! But I know I'll at least have Dalton forever, whether as a best friend, a brother, or even a husband. I can't wait to grow old with him regardless of what he is to me.


When I go by Slow Club

If we’re both not married by twenty-two
Could I be so bold and ask you?
If we’re both not married by twenty-three
Will you make my year and ask me?

If we’re both not married by twenty-four
Will you pass me those kneepads and I’ll get on the floor?
If we’re both not married by twenty-five
I hope that there’s some childish spark still alive

Cause there are so many lessons
That I just never cared to learn
And there are so many questions that still burn
Like will you hold my hand when I go?
Will you hold my hand when I go?
Will you hold my hand when I go?
Will you hold my hand when I go?

If I get to thirty and I don’t have a wife
I’ll ask you nicely but I won’t ask twice
If I get to forty and I don’t have a spouse
I’ll fashion you a letter and I’ll send it to your house
If I get to sixty will you let me slip away
Into an armchair for the rest of my days?
Cause you’ve got your family and I’ve got mine
The love that we shared was for another time

Cause there are so many lessons
That I just never cared to learn
And there are so many questions that still burn
Like will you hold my hand when I go?
Will you hold my hand when I go?
Will you hold my hand when I go?
Will you hold my hand when I go?

The Devil

I have come to realize that God has decided to use college as the challenge of my young adult life. He knows I can do it, and is forcing me to realize that I know I can do it too. This first semester was almost the death of me. With living situations and just everything that is going on in my life, I wanted to quit... several times. Then God shows me what he has planned for my life and I can hardly hold back the excitement. I can't wait till this world tells me I am qualified enough to do God's will. It is a day I can barely wait for.

Dear college,
Go ahead and try to kick my butt. I've got God on my side, which means you are pretty much screwed. See you at graduation.
Sincerely, me.

The most wonderful time of the year...

Tonight my family started to decorate for Christmas. For the most part, it went alright, until about the last 20 minutes. Then all hell broke loose, and we all gave up. Why is it that "the most wonderful time of the year" is always the most stressful time of the year? Traveling, school finals, seeing family, preparing for one big day. Then all of a sudden it's December 26th, and its all over.  It's sad really. So this year I've decided to try to embrace the month of December as much as I can! Now if only it would snow in Albuquerque...

The "Fat" Friend

I always feel like the fat friend, so I am starting to take initiative. I'm currently on a track of losing weight. The first 3 or 4 days I did really good, but I am starting to fall out of the habit already. Not good. At the beginning of the summer i weighed about 163, and I've gotten down to 154. That's pretty good for now. My ideal weight is 140... and I will get there, eventually.

My biggest problem is I always feel like giving up, like my goal weight is impossible...
But its not... I just need more will power. I finally got the people in my house to get on the same level. My brother-in-law marked up all the boxes and bags of food to make sure we are watching our serving sizes and what not. It was so nice of him. Me and my sister are counting calories and are trying to work out together. With God's help... we'll get there, and we'll be as ecstatic as this chick...

And one day I'll look like this chick :D

With your help friends :) i'll try to keep you updated! I am hoping to lose at Least 5 more pounds before Kacey's party in a few weeks. wish me luck!!!

"Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night.  I miss you like hell." 
 ~Edna St Vincent Millay

yeah baby, lets fly

No one is afraid of flying...

They are all just afraid to fall.

Ever wonder why so many people are ready to take that leap of faith, and then are so surprised when they land on their asses? Yeah, me too. Everyone in this world insists on setting their standards so impossibly high, that no one can possibly reach them. I love... I love with all my heart. But I never expect anything in return, so in theory I should never really get hurt, right? Wrong. Because I let my imagination run, as fast as it can, and it always thinks of what "could" be. And what "could" be is always so amazing. I'm one of those silly people that always lands on their ass... I have dreams of flying, and (as of just recently) dreams of being his, and how amazing it would all be. Me and Him? if he'd let us... we'd be perfect. We'd mesh together like one. Like it should be... Like it should have been...
Oh God, if it's in your will...
RMS can we please be 11 and in love again?

love love love

"I get the best feeling in the world when you say hi or even smile at me because I know, even if its just for a second, that I've crossed your mind."

~ Unknown

Mine?

"Do you remember, we were sittin' there, by the water?
You put your arm around me for the fist time
You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter
You are the best thing that's ever been mine"

What a night... Every emotion I thought I shoved off, hid away, got over, came rushing back when I rang that doorbell and knew he'd be the one to answer it, willingly. He opened that door, and I felt 11 again. It's been 7 years, and tonight made it feel like the first time. A monster truck rally isn't really where one would expect to "rekindle" what once was. But tonight was perfect, anything I could have asked for. I had butterflies the entire time. And if it's in God's will, I'll get him back; Because I can honestly say, he's the best thing that was ever mine.
 RMS <3 JEH? 
We'll find out :)

Women should dress to impress

I wanna dress like this everyday. I wanna dress up and feel like a girl. Instead of the jeans and vans that I have become accustomed to. Why is it that women have started to dress like men? Is it to feel on the same level as them in the work place? Because dressing like a man does not make you a man. So why not dress up like they used to? Why not feel beautiful and elegant everyday? I miss the days when it was expected of women to dress up. Oh where have the times gone...

Fell in love

"Your on this stage just as much as I am... All my songs are about you."

Just something I saw today,  I fell in love.

The Best

This is Dalton. He and I have been best friends ever since I can remember. He's there for me always and vice versa. I can't imagine going a day without him. I look up to him so much, and he's helped me through a lot of hard times in my life. I believe that every girl should have a best friend like him, because he's near perfect. He will always be there when I need him, and he makes me feel safe. He's like a world wonder! Ladies, if you find yourself a Dalton... don't let him go.

Thankful

"The family is a haven in a heartless world."

From Alice to Cinderella

Went to the best Halloween party ever this weekend, and after I spilled some root beer on my Alice in Wonderland apron, I very quickly went from Alice to modern day Cinderella. Made a lot of new friends, and took a lot of pictures (which is strange for me). I love dressing up, so I've decided that Halloween is definitely the holiday for me. Next Halloween me and my friends plan to be Disney Princesses! Can't Wait! I hope you were safe on Halloween. Thanksgiving... Here I come!

Take my advice...

"Patience is waiting. Not passively waiting. That is laziness. But to keep going when the going is hard and slow - that is patience."

Hero

Today, I'm a hero! I gave blood and passed out! Ah the joys of having your blood taken away from you. I don't know how i keep doing it. It ALWAYS hurts me, and i always feel real fishy afterwards. Oh well, its for a good cause, especially considering that i'm O-. I'm a rare gem ;)
I highly recommend giving blood! Go be a hero today! Think of whose life you could be saving!
United Blood Services

Never Have I Ever...

Have you ever seen someone be able to pull off a lemon yellow dress? I never have, at least not until now. Sarah Jessica Parker is amazing. Sex and the City 2 is coming out soon!!!!!!!!!

I loath you...

Its hard to hate college, but know you have to go anyways. I want to be a strong, independent and successful woman. It is nearly impossible for that to happen without a marvelous college education.
It gets even harder to hate college when every old woman at your church thinks you should love it; and when every family member you have is breathing down your neck. No pressure... no pressure. I'm a first year college student, and i want out... now.

Quote O' the Day


"A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous."
-Ingrid Bergman

Dress It Up

More girls should wear hair pieces. I absolutely love wearing flowers and other such fun things in my hair. And it makes an outfit more exciting. I've made some of my own, and they turn out wonderful, and then no one else has them :) That's the best part. Be creative! And go out of your comfort zone with your style! My life tip for the day :)

New Fascination

I have found a new fascination with Emma Roberts. Her style and her movies are wonderful. She has an AMAZING shoe collection. Plus she knows what's up on the red carpet. You should take the time to Google her. Emma is fantastic! She has become my fashion idol. LOVE!!!

honesty is my best trait

My mouth can get me in trouble for what comes out of it, but some people consider it a blessing. Do you ever think about the little things? Like why girls feel the need to carry a back pack AND a purse? one or the other ladies. or why almost all overweight girls seem to feel the need to wear the tightest bottoms they can find? It doesn't make you look better, sorry. Find something that actually fits you to accentuate your curves :) And have you ever thought while looking at someone "did you even look at yourself before you left the house?" The little things are what keep my eyes widened all day long.

run wild

Quote O' the Day

"maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed, maybe they need to run wild until they find someone just as wild to run with."

the beginning of time

Today i created my blog, and oh how excited I am! I can't wait to share all my ups and downs with people i know and do not. Never did I ever think I would have my very own blog :)